


Problematic MCYT one-shots!

by Problematic_Vibes_Only



Category: no - Fandom
Genre: Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, LMAO, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Smut, dont like dont read, help this is my first time on a03 how do tags work, if u found this u were looking for it, im in severe pain help, kinda crackfic but i am also v serious, what
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-14 22:54:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29549628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Problematic_Vibes_Only/pseuds/Problematic_Vibes_Only
Summary: AYO HOW ARE WE PROBLEMATIC MCYT (probably not too good ngl) anyways hi yes hello Im Dove and im a writer how are we chat, im problematic, antis fuck off we dont want u <3
Comments: 7
Kudos: 2





	1. intro!!

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there! I'm Dove and I use vae/vaem. Neopronouns are pog and if you don't respect them I don't respect you. /srs ANYWAYS READ THE BOOK

hi there! I'm Dove and all u need to know abt me is in the notes <3  
So uh  
what we up to  
here's a list of what I will and will not do:  
_**Will**_ :  
minor/adult (e.g., Sapnap x Tommy)  
minor/minor (e.g., purpled x ranboo)  
Im fine with writing gore as part of a one-shot, except for like major major gore. (subject to change both ways)  
dub-con is fine  
'problematic' ships (e.g., shlattbur)  
threesomes and foursomes are both doable   
basically any kink   
**_Will NOT:_**  
full non-con/rape. iffy for me. sorry.  
any kinks including bodily,, fluids (scat/piss kinks, i hate writing those words and I will not write oneshots about them.)  
I will not write about anyone younger than 14.  
I will not write about Niki. (System reasons (OSDD-1b), she's basically my _mother_ )  
orgies   
I'll do basically any mcyt area. (kinda ehhhh abt Hermitcraft rn bc I have a hugeeee hc AU in the works but if you really want me to I'll do it)  
x readers, dont like those  
_**wont wanna do but will if i have to**_ :  
ANY SHIP CONTAINING DREAM OTHER THAN DREOSQUARE. please my mental state is stuck in december, I have no scale of time after the 11th, please I am begging you do not ask me to do any ship containing dream other than dream x geosquare please  
any ship with 2b2t people (again, system reasons)

requests are open bc I'm brainless  
I'm partial to:  
Dreosquare  
any ship with sapnap  
any ship with purpled  
small cc ships (Presnt/evakz, Kayzeee, etc etc yall get it right)   
  
  
  
  
EVERYTHING IS SUBJECT TO CHANGE   
wanna join the discord? https://discord.gg/RtugjTcr22

If you have any questions, ask or dm me on discord!! Problematic_Vibes_Only#8194

(the amount of times i previewed this is not even funny please help)


	2. Im too tired to think of a title so aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bad gets fucked by eggpire vines and then skeppy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically tentacle fucking ig, I dont even know, its pretty vanilla other than that other than overstimulation also I somehow fell back in love with Skephalo so maybe expect more of that i dont know probably not i dont have any plans to write more next chapter probably out soon, this one is a goddamn mess nd sloppy as hell please im so sorry for this chapter, its also really short im sorry i just lost motivation and energy

_**Bad x Eggpire vines im on some real good shit tonight boys)  
**_  
Bad stalked the edges of Eggpire, netherite armor gleaming. It was a nice day out, not too hot, and the sun was covered by clouds. Bad had been put on patrol duty for the day while Ant and Punz nurtured the egg and spreaded propaganda.  
A vine wrapped around his ankle, stopping him from moving. “Huh? Is something wrong?” The vine flicked. A clear _no_. It unwrapped itself from the guard’s leg, pointing in the direction of the base. “Okay,” Bad hesitantly followed it back to the main camp, gaining confidence as he walked.  
  
Bad was still confused when he entered the base. And even more so when four separate vines gripped his arms and legs, tearing off his armor and clothing. The ravenette gasped, oh god this could only get worse. The vines wrapped around him, smooth and slippery and _wet_. They wrapped around his arms and legs again, stopping him from moving in nearly every way. One vine forced its entry in his mouth, and Bad nearly choked on the taste. Bad was so, so glad the other Eggpire members were out right now. How would they feel, seeing their _leader_ being used so roughly by the vines? Being used like a slut for them? Bad gagged as the vine’s end hit his throat. Oh god, why did that feel _good_? Bad didn’t even try to fight it, the vines gripped him tighter. Bad didn’t even struggle, just letting himself be used by the vines. The ravenette moaned as the vine removed itself from his mouth. The vine teased at his entrance, making Bad whimper. The vine slowly pushed in, Bad’s body tensing up from the sudden entry. Bad let out a soft moan, trying not to struggle as the vine basically _fucked him_. Bad knew he shouldn't like this, but oh god he felt so, so good and it was so hard to resist. The vine seemed to notice this, beginning to move inside of him. Another vine wrapped around his dick, going up and down as a means of jerking him off. Bad let out an unholy moan, arching his back in a painfully wonderful position.  
Bad was in tears when a third red tendril pushed at his lips. The demon boy obediently took it in his mouth, gagging as it hit the back of his throat almost instantly. The over-stimulation drove him crazy, he wanted to come so badly but he couldn't, he knew he couldn't. His body ached but everything still felt overwhelmingly amazing. The poor ravenette took everything those damn vines gave him, sobbing and moaning and gagging all the while.  
Bad's eyes widened when he saw someone walk into the room. And oh, it wasn't just anyone, it happened to be his best friend, _Skeppy._ Bad prayed he wouldn't be seen, because oh god it would be so embarrassing to be seen this exposed, getting used like this. The ravenette shoved down the noises that wanted to escape from his throat. Sadly, his prayers weren't answered and Bad blushed a deep red when he saw Skeppy lay his eyes on him. Bad's mind raced when Skeppy walked towards him. The vines seemed to recoil in Skeppy's presence, pulling off of Bad. The vines around Bad's wrist tightened, however, not willing to leave the ravenette alone. Skeppy cut the vines off of him and Bad fell to his knees, his body just couldn't support him anymore. Skeppy kneeled down next to him. "Are you alright?" He asked softly. "Water would be nice," Bad's voice was raspy. "I'll get some, gimme a minute," The brunette hurried off in search of some water. Bad groaned. His wrists ached, actually, most of his body ached so much he could barely move.  
It wasn't long before Skeppy came back with a glass of water, handing it to the ravenette. Bad took it, hands shaking as he sat up and drank it. "Lay back down, you want some, ahem, help with that?" Bad didn't look at Skeppy, but he nodded. The brunette leaned in, giving Bad a sweet kiss before pulling back and wrapping his lips around the tip of Bad's dick. Bad forced down a loud moan, god, Skeppy was so _good_ at this. Skeppy wasted no time taking the entirety of Bad's length into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the tip. Bad couldn't stop himself this time, a broken moan pushed past his lips, sounding more like a sob than a moan. Skeppy looked up at him with innocent eyes and god Bad could barely contain himself. "Skeppy, Skeppy I'm cl-close oh my goodness," Skeppy pulled away long enough to say, "Already? Christ you're so impatient," before ducking his head back down and continuing to suck Bad off. "Skeppy!~ Oh my goodness Skeppy you're so good~" The ravenette moaned out. Skeppy sped up, hallowing out his cheeks and bobbing his head, edging Bad on. Choked moans escaped Bad, gasping has the tip of his dick hit Skeppy's throat. “Please Skeppy oh- oh my goodness please,” Bad didn’t know what he was begging for, but he _begged_. Skeppy didn’t stop, quickly bringing Bad to tears for the second time that night. “Skeppy, Skeppy please, please can I come please Skeppy,” The ravenette’s voice was broken from moaning and crying all night. The brunette looked up at Bad with the most perfect look he could, and Bad _broke_. He just couldn’t take any more, cumming down the other’s throat with a moan. Skeppy pulled off of Bad, wiping away the cum around his lips with his arm. The ravenette flushed red, looking away. “That was so good Bad,” Skeppy murmured. “You have no idea how much I want to ride you until you’re completely broken, begging for me to slow down, stop, I want to break you so much, you’re just too perfect,” Skeppy leaned in close, giving Bad another sweet kiss, drawing it out and not wanting to pull away. Bad ended it first, pulling away and gasping for air. Skeppy quickly closed the gap between them, hardly giving Bad any time to breathe. “Too bad I already broke you, it seems,” Skeppy pulled away, whispering those words in Bad’s ear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the words of one of my favorite authors: an abrupt ending, shhh  
> I was very drunk on Sleep deprivation while writing/coming up with this, please someone tell me to go to bed


	3. NOT AN UPDATE SORRY

LMAOOOOO I LITEALLY POSTED THIS FROM MY SCHOOL PC IM FRCIKING SOBBIGN HBIHGDVHSDJV OK ACTUAL NEW CHAPTER WHENEVER I WRITE ENOUGH TO BE SATISFIED


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